How Well Do You Know Your Neighbors?

If you grew up in the kind of neighborhood I did, then you remember people sitting out on their front porches in the evenings, kids playing out in the neighbors yard until it was too dark to see and the mad rush to the ice cream truck when that little jingle was first heard on the street.

Nowadays, that scene is almost non-existent. Many parents are working late, then have to pick up the kids from their day care provider and rush home to make dinner, spend a little quality time with the kids and then off to bed to start all over again. Parents are worried that the streets aren't safe. People drive everywhere, and the most you see someone is when you are both getting into your car at the same time.

There are many benefits to having a close relationship with your neighbors. Research shows that neighborhoods where people know each other by name and are connected to one another have lower crime rates. It has even been shown that kids who live in tight knit communities do better in school.

Maybe it is time for us to bring back the days of yesterday, and get to know our neighbors. One way you can do this is by making a neighborhood directory. Send a letter (or even better, deliver it in person) asking your neighbors if they would like to be included in a neighborhood directory. A sample letter can be found here. Have them complete a form that provides you with information to put in the directory. A sample form can be found here. Once you have collected the completed forms, print a directory and distribute it to your neighbors. You can also email the directory to them to save on paper costs.

Another idea is to start a website for your neighborhood. You can get a free website from Geocities (http://www.geocities.com) or Neighborhood Link (http://www.neighborhoodlink.com). You can put a calendar of events in your area on the site, or perhaps list the email addresses of the residents. A bulletin board can be used to post announcements or special needs.

What about an old-fashioned potluck dinner or backyard barbecue. Invite your neighbors and ask them to bring a covered dish or dessert to share! What a wonderful way to get to know the people in your neighborhood. You might enjoy it so much that you turn it into a monthly event!

In this day and age, it is even more critical that we know those who live around us. Our very safety might depend on it. But there is also so much joy to be found right in your backyard! A host of new friends (and babysitters!) can be found just a stone's throw away from your front door. And perhaps, all of your neighbors are just sitting there waiting for you to make it all happen!

Originally posted on CharlotteMommies.com

Classic Western Burgers

Ingredients:
10 slices thick-cut bacon (about 3/4 lb. total)
2 large eggs
2/3 cup milk
1 onion (about 8 oz.), peeled and minced
2 teaspoons minced garlic
About 1 1/4 teaspoons salt
About 1/2 teaspoon pepper
3 pounds ground lean (about 7% fat) beef
1 cup soft bread crumbs (see notes)
10 slices red onion (each 1/4 in. thick and 3 to 4 in. wide)
10 slices (about 4 by 4 in.) extra-sharp white or yellow cheddar cheese (about 5 oz. total)
10 hamburger buns (each about 4 in. wide; 3 oz.), split in half
Special slaw

Cooking Instructions:
1. In a 10- to 12-inch frying pan over medium-high heat, cook bacon, in batches if necessary, turning occasionally, until browned on both sides and crisp, 8 to 10 minutes. With tongs, transfer to paper towels to drain. When cool, break each slice in half.
2. Meanwhile, in a large bowl, beat eggs, milk, onion, garlic, 1 1/4 teaspoons salt, and 1/2 teaspoon pepper to blend. Add beef and bread crumbs and mix gently. Form into 10 equal patties, each about 4 1/2 inches wide.

3. Brush onion slices lightly on both sides with bacon fat in pan. Discard remaining fat.

4. Lay patties and onion slices on a barbecue grill over a solid bed of hot coals or high heat on a gas grill (you can hold your hand at grill level only 2 to 3 seconds); close lid on gas grill. Cook, turning meat and onions once to brown on both sides, until a thermometer inserted in center of thickest part of meat registers 160 degrees (no longer pink in center), 6 to 8 minutes total.

5. About 2 minutes before patties are done, top each with a slice of cheese. Also lay bun halves, cut side down, on grill and toast 1 to 2 minutes.

6. Set bun bottoms on a platter or plates. With a wide spatula, transfer patties to bun bottoms. Top each with a grilled onion slice, 2 pieces of bacon, and a spoonful of special slaw. Add salt and pepper to taste. Cover with bun tops.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Becky"

A common complaint of many mothers is the daily struggle of what to wear. Most mothers express exasperation that they dress too casually, and some say, sloppily. Many mothers do not have the time in their busy schedules to devote to finding appropriate and attractive clothing.
Help can be found with a wardrobe consultant who will review your closet, assist you in determining your clothing needs, provide shopping assistance, and organize your closet.


If you find that you stand in front of your closet full of clothes and have nothing to wear, I recommend that you find someone to watch the children for a half day and devote it to reviewing
the clothing in your closet. Put on some music of your choice and pop open a Diet Coke or have a glass of wine if you're feeling more adventuresome. You'll need to try on everything, unless by sight you find that an item is too worn, stained, or a size that you haven't seen for awhile.

Once you try on the remaining clothing ask yourself the following questions:
1. Does it fit?
2. Does the color suit me?
3. When was the last time I wore this?
4. Does this fit into my current life situation? (i.e. a stay-at-home mom doesn't need a closet full
of power suits);and,
5. Do I like it? (can I run into an old boyfriend and feel attractive?).

Items that don't meet the above criteria can be donated to a charity. Please make sure that the item is in good condition; the rule is to only donate what you would consider buying. Items with tags still attached can be sold on eBay or at a consignment shop. The balance of the items can be
tossed or recycled for your "rag bag."

Most women need the following for a casual winter wardrobe:
1. Jeans in a darker wash;
2. A pair of black pants. The current style recalling Audrey Hepburn looks good on most women
and can be dressed up or down. I recommend that you have several pairs so that when one pair is
in the wash, you have another to wear;
3. A pair of corduroy pants in a boot cut style;
4. A few sweaters in a classic style. I happen to like the J Crew Wesley cable style in the v-neck
so you can layer a blouse or t-shirt under. Plus, they are really soft and wear well;
5. A pair of short boots to wear under your jeans and pants;
6. A pair of flat shoes to wear with your black pants. Try black or an animal print for more style;
7. T-shirts in white and other colors that you like. The Old Navy ones are a terrific value;
8. A sweater coat - a Fair Isle type weave will add pop to your pants and jeans. Also, it doesn't
get that cold in Richmond, and, since we spend most of our days in cars, a heavy coat isn't needed for most days; and,
9. A "real" winter coat for colder days.

That's all you need. I find that the more choices women have, the harder it is to decide what to wear. Pare down and you'll find that you are more confident and ready to face the world!
The best part of the above list is that you can order these by catalog or on the internet. This is my favorite way to shop because I can try the clothing on at my own pace and match them to my existing pieces. No need to drag a 2 and 4 year old through the mall!
Now you need to organize your closet. Take out anything that isn't clothing related. Find a new place for Christmas paper, sport equipment, and toys. When you're doing this it's a great time to streamline your home. Make sure that you are using the same style of hanger; it takes up less rod space. I like the plastic "jewel" style hanger that you find in department stores. You should also buy a few shoe boxes and some baskets to put belts and scarves in. You can get these items at Target for a reasonable price.

Originally posted on RichmondMommies

When I say "Super Mommy" what is it that comes to mind? Do images of any combo of the following; spotless houses, pristine, genius children, 8 arms, soccer trophies, winning the bread, and a brilliant relationship come to mind? I hope not, cuz I'm writing to tell you that "Super Mommy" is the Mommy who knows herself, who gives of her true self freely to her family, she is the woman who has simply elaborated on the already spectacular chic she is, the woman who has created a family without losing herself. I am here to tell you that we can still skip along on our own individual paths to find and nurture self while bringing our mommy selves to the table. When "who we are"is the actual foundation of our life, everything sort of falls into place. I am one hell of a "Super Mommy" and I may look and do things very, very differently from another "Super Mommy."

How many times have we insisted that we "Just want to be Happy"and how many times have we had the option or opportunity to actually bask in "pure, uninterrupted Happiness?" For me personally I would have to say: Not much. Why is this so? I have come to understand it as a simple misunderstanding of words and a misperception of needs and desires.

What is happiness exactly, is it a state of being or just another emotion that flutters within us? I acknowledge happiness to be one emotion in an extensive and complicated cauldron of emotions, felt by a person either alone or simultaneously with other emotions. I have determined that in my own life it is not Happiness that I am in need of or desire, rather I work for Well-Being. So what is Well-Being? This question in and of itself is so very complicated, and while I have found what is the most comprehensive way possible to define it in these particular moments of my life, that is not to say it will not evolve into something different at another time. Well-being is the collective health and wellness of one's physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, and connected self. Wellness is a symptom of well-being, indicating individually defined balance.

I spent a great deal of time, introspection, and energy developing an understanding of what it really meant for me to be well and whole. During the course of this development it occurred to me that I really didn't know very much about myself. I had always adapted to whatever role was necessary at the time and here I was doing the exact same thing as a mom. Now I've always known on some level that I was a pretty awesome chic and while I may have longed to know myself, I never really invested. Once I had my son, I felt a sense of urgency that was exceptionally difficult to ignore; didn't he deserve to know me, who I truly am? Didn't he deserve every ounce of me?

My initial process went a little something like this: I had my son which fulfilled me in ways I never thought possible and it lit a flame under my "tushy"to get on the ball and learn to be whole and well as the very best me possible. I came across some feminist literature, which I found absolutely empowering and compelling. I re-united with a dear friend and almost immediately following that we began to take a Spirituality class, which led me to intense exploration of goddess cultures and the Divine Feminine. Next thing I knew I was feeling good about me and completely absorbed in anything about The Goddess. I started to look a bit more closely at feminist theory and perspective and began to form my own thoughts and opinions regarding those particular topics. All of a sudden I was a fantastic Mother, who loved her plush body and herself, a self proclaimed sexy and fierce feminist, who loved fashion and make-up again, falling back in love with my son's father (my partner), a "witchy"witch again, and completely engulfed by Goddess Spirituality. This is the "me"my son deserves, this is the woman he will admire and look to for guidance. What better gift can I give him?

We cannot forget ourselves, we cannot learn to just "make it"in the chaos that permeates our lives. Most of the moms I know are full-time everything: partners, parents, employees, chefs, housekeepers, and all of that other good stuff. Most moms I know are driven by the societal pressures and expectations of being a "super mom"and while a lot of us have varying degrees of help and support from our partners we are still consistently reminded of the imposed obligations that come with being a "super mom." I say screw that, I say that the most important thing is having a loving, meaningful relationship with my son and partner; when I get home from work I want to be with them, sit at the table and eat, play on the floor, snuggle up and watch a movie. If that means dinner isn't always "home"cooked and my house is a bit "lived in," so be it, who cares? My son knows me and he knows that his mommy and daddy love one another and enjoy their time with him. He knows what it is to be a part of something beautiful and full; our family is full of love, play, acceptance, and a genuine enjoyment of one another. When we clean, we play; when we cook, we play; when we shop, we play; and while my house is not spotless and my meals are not gourmet, my home is a home with a real, devoted family in it and I know what I need and I am not at all afraid to insist that I get it.

I cannot emphasize enough that women must individually determine their worth as a mom and acknowledge that the messages we receive about motherhood from the media and magazines, maybe even our friends and families are potentially based in misinformation and stereotypical ideology. We must find what works for us and we must always remember that we are still important; we must be nurtured and cared for by ourselves if we are to expect it from others. We must laugh at ourselves and engage our own growth and development, never forgetting that there is always something new to learn about ourselves. Our children, our partners, our jobs, and whatever other responsibilities that we have are not the end all be all of us.

I am not a mother who happens to be a feminist and a witch, I am a "Witchy, Feminist Mother"who happens to love, cherish, and adore herself. You may be an "Artsy, Activist Mom," "A Domestic Goddess," or an "Intellectual, Writer Mom;" whatever it may be, figure it out and Live it.

Originally posted on CharlotteMommies.com

Fish, Veracruz Style

Ingredients:
6 tablespoons oil
1 no. 2 1/2 can tomatoes, chopped
1 teaspoon sugar
3 teaspoons chili powder
1/2 teaspoon allspice
1 clove of garlic, crushed
1/2 teaspoon grated orange rind
Salt and pepper to taste
1 onion, chopped well
6 - 8 red snapper fillets
1 small can pimientos, chopped coarsely
2 tablespoons capers
One 3-oz jar green olives, pitted and chopped coarsely
Parsley, fresh, chopped as a garnish
3 boiled potatoes (optional)


Cooking Instructions:
Heat 3 tablespoons oil in heavy skillet. Combine the tomatoes with the sugar, chili powder, allspice, garlic, orange rind, salt, pepper and onion. Blend well and simmer in oil for about 10 minutes, covered. Coat baking dish with remaining oil. Put the fish in baking dish; add the pimientos, capers and olives to the tomato mixture and pour over the fish. Bake in a moderate (350 degree) oven for about 30-35 minutes or until fish flakes easily when pierced with a fork. Sprinkle with just enough fresh parsley to add a little color.




Additional Comments:
Serve the potatoes on the side or some people prefer to add cubed, hot, boiled potatoes to the fish during the last 5-7 minutes of cooking.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by a member

Do you have a perpetual fog around you as you go through each day? Do you forget what you were about to do/say/ask right after it pops into your head? Is your one consistent thought really a prayer that you will get more than two hours of sleep at any one time? I was right where you are now for the first 9 months of my twin’s lives. I had tried everything, researched for hours, bought books...reflux and teething were initial issues, but even after these abated the sleep challenges continued.

I ended up sleeping on a bed in the nursery with my son (my daughter had few sleep issues). He would not stay asleep for more than 45 minutes at a time and wanted to be nursed back to sleep--I would try to sneak him into the crib and he would immediately wake and be very upset with me.

I found out I had trained him to only fall asleep by my nursing/holding him, and the slightest try for freedom would reset him to his neediest self all through the night. While I fully support co-sleeping, it seemed this arrangement made both of us wake far more often then was healthy for either of us.

I was at my wits end when I tried Suzy Giordano's book, "The Baby Sleep Solution: A Proven Program to Teach Your Baby to Sleep Twelve Hours a Night.' The best part is there's very little crying involved. I learned really helpful tips, such as most babies want to sleep earlier than we schedule them, even if they act charged up until bedtime.

Basically, Giordano’s method is in three steps:

# 1: Feed four times a day, every four hours. Make sure they get 24 oz or more a day, or a full nursing session (keeps them from wanting to snack all night). If they get fussy early, distract with a walk or new activity. Try to stay within 15 minutes of schedule. Do solids at the same time if feeding.

# 2: Do your bathing/pre-bed routine at the same time in the same order every night, feeding last--then place baby in crib awake (full, warm, dry), leave AND CLOSE THE DOOR--no sneaking! If she cries, wait 3 or so minutes, come back in, comfort. Don't pick up, but rub belly, sshhh, etc. Leave as soon as she calms, and repeat until she falls asleep. The first night can take four hours or more, but each night gets easier. By three nights, my son went from wailing to no crying when I left the room. It was a relief to be able to go in to him and not let him get hysterical.

# 3: When the first steps work, start to place baby in crib awake during naps after a shortened pre-nap routine using the same method.

The first week was a nightmare of no naps ( I almost gave up) because I had gotten them into feeding before naps, but I adjusted naps to within 2 hours of feeding, and they got fully used to it by 10 days (AM nap for 1 hour, 2 hour PM nap).

Both babies now regularly sleep from 7:30-6:30! While still nursing, I did one feeding if their little night cries escalated--they usually didn't eat enough during the day on those nights.

Good luck and happy sleeping! 

 

Source: Giordano, Suzy. The Baby Sleep Solution: A Proven Program to Teach Your Baby to Sleep Twelve Hours a Night.

Submitted by Angel from NorthMetroDCMommies.  Originally posted on the NorthMetroDCMommies Blog on June 15, 2011.

My husband, Adam, left this morning for a conference in Houston, TX.  He's gone to conferences before, but this is the first one since Rowan was born.  I always have had a lot of respect for single parents, when he's gone that respect just grows and grows.  Each conference he's gone to has presented me with new and different challenges as a parent.  The first conference Kara was just a year old and she got her first big illness.  I was unable to get much sleep or food.  All she wanted was to lay on my lap and be held.  Going to the bathroom was an adventure: have you ever tried to hitch your pants up when your child is strapped to you and throwing up at the same time?  Other conferences I've had the joys of explaining to Kara why her dad isn't there and why he wasn't going to be home for x days.   I got quite skilled at keeping her distracted from his absence.  This time though I am presented with 2 new challenges.  The first being that I now have two children, one that is awake frequently during the night and needs much of my attention (and body).  The second is one I had not thought of before.

How do you express emotions around your children?  Prior to Kara when Adam would go to a conference I would have cried a bit, gone home, eaten junk food and watched TV, read some books, done a puzzle and stayed up way past my bedtime.  Now I know better than to spend my time watching TV, staying up late and eating junk food.  I'm sure I'll read plenty of books and may do some puzzles. Granted the books may not be more complicated than naming dinosaurs and the puzzles will have less than 50 pieces.  But what to do about the desire to cry?  Do I show Kara how sad I am that her dad has left?  Do I let her see how worried I am about how our time alone will go and his safety?  Or do I keep a stiff upper lip and keep on going as if nothing has changed?  If I don't express my emotions, in a healthy way that is, am I teaching Kara to not acknowledge her own emotions?  Does that teach her to be a stoic and afraid of emotions?  If I show her the tears does that then lead her to fear and worry when she shouldn't have that burden?  Will she feel she needs to take care of me since I am sad?  This also leads me to examine how we deal with Kara's tantrums and other outbursts of emotion.  Right now we ask her to calm down and say that once she is calm we can talk about what is bothering her. But does that teach her that she shouldn't express the emotion?  Would it be better to say "wow, you are really sad/angry/upset.  Let's take a moment to be that way, then we can calm down and talk about what has made you feel that way"?  We do try to acknowledge the emotion by saying "you sound really sad", but is that enough?  Do we need to give her more space to feel and express the emotion?  I want to raise children that are not afraid of their emotions and can express them in a healthy way.  I don't want them learning to stuff their feelings down or to think that it's not ok to let others know how they are feeling.  Emotions can be powerful and influence our thinking more than we often realize or admit.  To have a healthy relationship with emotions would allow them to recognize, feel, and then move on past the emotions so they do not influence their decisions excessively.  The question is- how to achieve that.

Submitted by Heidi-rose Creuzinger, member of NorthMetroDCMommies.  Heidi-rose blogs at Terror at 3 Feet & Rising.

Photo by: SingChan

Pani PoPo ~ Samoan Coconut Bread

Ingredients:
* 1 (12 ounce) package frozen dinner rolls, thawed
* 1 (10 ounce) can coconut milk
* 3 tablespoons sweetened condensed milk(optional)
* 3/4 cup white sugar, or to taste


Cooking Instructions:
1. Coat a 9x13 inch baking dish with cooking spray. Coat your hands with cooking spray or shortening, and roll the dough balls in your hands so that they have a light coating. Place in the prepared dish. Set aside in a warm place to rise until doubled, up to 2 hours.
2. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). In a small bowl, stir together the coconut milk, sweetened condensed milk and sugar. Pour this mixture over the top of the rolls as evenly as you can.
3. Bake for 15-30 minutes in the preheated oven, until golden brown. Let cool for a few minutes before separating and serving.


Serving Suggestions:
This is great for desert or as an appetizer.


Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Katie"

The Mommies Network National Auction closes Saturday, August 13, at 10 p.m. EST! There are but a few hours left to place your bids. With more than 600 items, ranging from boutique clothing to autographed books to tickets to Dollywood, there is sure to be something for every taste and budget.

Click on a link below to see what's what in each category!
Amusement Parks, Activities, and Travel
Beauty 
Books, Music, and Games
Children's Clothing
Classes and Lessons
Crafts, Collectibles, and Toys
Decor and Home Items
Dining
Fashion and Jewelry
Health and Fitness
Infant Items
Infant/Child Gear
Maternity and Breastfeeding
Miscellaneous
Party Time
Photography Packages

By bidding on an item, you are helping mommies all over the country! Twenty-five percent of the proceeds from The Mommies Network National Auction will benefit Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. The remaining portion of the proceeds will go to furthering our mission:

To provide a safe, secure, FREE place for mothers to find support and encouragement from other mothers and to empower them to be better women, parents, and community leaders.

I now understand why, when I was young and got sick, my mom would go get my medication and come back with what I thought of as treat drinks and foods.  She was doing anything she could to get me to eat or drink!  I also understand why she would buy me something fun like a book, coloring book, activity book or some other activity I could do while sick.  For one, she was trying to keep me entertained by anything other than TV.  Two, she felt bad that I was so sick.

Kara has a double ear infection mixed with a cough that occasionally has that seal bark sound.  Thankfully her fever is mild and so far she hasn't thrown up.  The stomach bug was 2 weeks ago.  She will just rest her head on our lap and cry.  We've had such a hard time getting food in her that we're going to start offering Jello (I know, it's not really food.  But it's something!).  I need her to rest and stay inactive so that her body can fight the infections.  I'm also trying to tend to Rowan (who just got 2 vaccines).  Oh yeah, and get ready for Yule, Adam's birthday, and a trip to Wisconsin.  Oh yes, and still maintain the normal routines and needs of the house.  So I'm not able to play with Kara, or read to her, in a way that will keep her resting.  So, evil idiot box time it is.  I have never been so thankful for over 100+ channels, a DVR, DVD and VHS as I have when Kara is sick!  I feel so bad that she's so sick and doesn't get to play with friends (she will miss 2 playdates and 2 days of school this week.  I can't tell which of us is crying over that more).  I want to buy her treats and toys and things to cheer her up.  But dang if this kid doesn't have more than she normally plays with anyway.  So I restrain myself and say that it's my love, my attention and my compassion she needs more than my gifts.

I know part of my feeling bad for her is because she's been sick a lot lately.  She got sick before our trip to Minnesota- stomach bug.  Then she got sick on the way home from Minnesota- stomach bug on the plane.  And now she's sick again.  Oh yeah, that plane trip was very "interesting".  She threw up when we were at the airport, we had no clue she was sick.  Then she kept throwing up on the plane ride home.  And then again a few times at home.  We used all the motion sick bags we could get our hands on.  The flight attendants were very understanding thankfully.  Sadly they were all out of extra bags, thankfully other passengers gave us theirs.

Mom, I understand all you did when I was sick.  I hope that my girls feel as comforted and tended to as I did by you!

Submitted by Heidi-rose Creuzinger, member of NorthMetroDCMommies.  Heidi-rose blogs at Terror at 3 Feet & Rising.

I love "do it yourself" projects. I think I get it from my father who taught me how to fix cars and fish for food as a child. To this day, it's hard for me to buy fresh fish from a supermarket when I know I can put a hook and worm in the water and get it myself. So, when our dining room chairs needed reupholstering, I figured, "It can't be that hard," plus I had my trusty helper: RJ!

First, RJ, myself and my mother visited a local fabric store and selected a print we loved made of outdoor material. The fabric we chose is waterproof and allows for easy clean up when soiled. Perfect for a home with a 3.5 year old toddler and infant just learning to eat solids!

First step: Remove the padded seats from the chair base. Four screws and they were off!


Next: Remove the old seat covers. They were simply stapled on so it was easy to separate the fabric. Pull and tug! Watch the staples RJ!


Once the old fabric was removed we measured the new material and cut it to fit. Children's rounded tip scissors didn't seem to work on the fabric. Go figure!

Photo by: jspatchwork

Cheddar'd Summer Squash

Ingredients:
4 small yellow squash and/or
zucchini trimmed & cut in 1/2
lengthwise.
1/4 cup chopped green onion
nonstick cooking spray
1/8 tsp salt
ground pepper
2oz shredded sharp cheddar
cheese

Cooking Instructions:
1.preheat oven to 400. Arrange squash cut side up in 3 quart baking dish.
2.lightly coat squash with cooking spray. Sprinkle green onion,salt & pepper evenly.
3.top with cheese
4.Bake uncovered for 20 minutes or until squash is just tender and cheese is bubbly.


Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "christy."

It is said that it takes a village to raise a child, but it also takes a community to support a mother and to provide her with the resources, encouragement, and opportunities necessary for her to be her best. With more than 90 local chapters and a national site that reaches all moms, The Mommies Network provides that community.

We are a non-profit organization whose mission is to provide a safe, secure, FREE place for mothers to find support and encouragement from other mothers and to empower them to be better women, parents, and community leaders. Our philosophy is that no one should have to pay a fee to make a friend, so we offer free membership to any mother within the community who wishes to join. Members gain camaraderie and support through an online forum that is available 24 hours a day, as well as local events where mothers can meet and develop friendships that last a lifetime.


This August, The Mommies Network is hosting our second annual National Auction and will donate 25 percent of the funds raised to Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a national network of volunteer photographers who "introduce remembrance photography to parents suffering the loss of a baby with the free gift of professional portraiture … [to] serve as an important step in the family's healing process by honoring their child's legacy." The remaining 75 percent of funds raised will be used to further the mission of TMN to provide support to moms across the country.

We believe that by working together, mothers can change the world — one family, one neighborhood, one community at a time. The Mommies Network is a connecting force, helping us each to make a difference in our own lives, in our families, and in the places we call home.

The use of massage during labor is nothing new. Many tribal cultures throughout the world have traditionally incorporated massage into the birthing process. Nurturing touch during labor has been shown to enhance the laboring woman's mood and ability to cope with labor. In 1997 the Touch Research Institute at the University of Miami conducted a study and on the effects of massage during labor. Researchers found that women who received massage during labor experienced decreased levels of anxiety and pain. They needed less medication and their labors were shorter than those of the control group, who received only obstetrical care.


The onset of labor in preparation for birth is an intricate series of hormonal signals and interactions. It is believed that the baby is responsible for initiating labor with the mother's hormones taking over to ensure that labor continues to progress. Two important labor hormones, epinephrine and norepinephrine stimulate uterine muscles to contract. Anxiety in the laboring woman overstimulates the production of both of these hormones, resulting in slow, ineffectual and painful labor. A relaxed woman's hormone levels are more balanced allowing the uterus to be more effective in responding to the body's hormonal signals. In addition to traditional therapeutic massage techniques, Acupressure and reflexology can also be used to help balance hormone levels and stimulate the uterus. The result is contractions that are strong, rhythmic and effective. Body positioning is also important in encouraging the progression of labor. Standing, squatting and sitting are positions that maximize the use of gravity for the laboring woman, and help open up the pelvis in preparation for birth. However, with the use of epidural anesthesia, the laboring woman loses the ability to utilize these various birthing positions.

If a woman desires to birth naturally, without the use of pain medication, how does she endure the pain that accompanies labor? Massage serves as a distraction to labor and contraction pain. It is believed that flooding the brain with pleasurable sensations will help to override pain signals from the uterus. Massage can be very effective between and during contractions. Acupressure points can be utilized during contractions to decrease the level of pain. The time between contractions can be used to massage tired, clenched and cramping muscles. Managing pain during labor decreases the need for epidural anesthesia and therefore the need for later medical intervention.

Epidural anesthesia administered during the early stages of labor doubles the likelihood of a cesarean section. Because massage during labor has been shown to decrease the need for epidural anesthesia, it may also aid in preventing an unnecessary cesarean section birth. Epidurals also decrease the pushing sensation during delivery and therefore the use of forceps and vacuum extraction becomes more likely.

If a cesarean birth is deemed medically necessary prior to the onset of labor, massage can also be beneficial in preparing for the event. The days and weeks prior to surgery may be filled with stress, anxiety and fear of not knowing what to expect. Massage can play a very important role in helping moms cope with these emotions and help in gaining a sense of empowerment.

Massage for the laboring mother can be performed by a massage therapist or by the woman's partner. Partners can consult with their massage therapist prior to the onset of labor and then use the learned techniques from the moment labor begins up to the time of delivery. It is important to remember that a laboring woman's response to touch is unpredictable and may change at any time throughout labor. Open and honest communication with the therapist or partner is essential during the entire laboring process.


References:
Osborne-Sheets, Carole., Pre-and Perinatal Massage Therapy, Body Therapy Associates, San Diego, CA, 1998.

Stillerman, Elaine, LMT, Mother Massage, Dell, New York, NY, 1992.

Field, T., Ph.D.; et al., "Labor Pain is Reduced by Massage Therapy" Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics and Gynecology, Vol. 20, Dec 1997

Originally posted on CharloteMommies.com

As last summer approached, I remember reading posts on UnionCountyMommies (UCM) about upcoming travel plans, family vacations, free movie viewings, and securing memberships to the local water park. But one fellow mommy’s plans really stood out because they were so different from the rest. She was raising money to cover the expenses of a hosting a child from Belarus for six weeks.

And this year, around the same time, I saw similar posts go up again…she was planning, fundraising, and even longing to bring back that same little girl. It was clear her family had had an amazing experience, one that was worth far more than the time, effort, and money they had put into it. I was so moved by her desire to help in this way, and I wanted to get more information about the program. I wanted to learn more about children and let others know how they too, can get involved.

So I was thrilled when UCM member, Heather Efird, graciously agreed to take time out of her busy life and answer all of my questions! The program goes by the name ABRO, which Heather explained stands for American Belarussian Relief Organization. It is a national, non-profit organization whose focus is to improve the quality of life, and the health, of children living in and around areas of Belarus affected by the Chernobyl disaster in April of 1986.

The first group to come over, in 1989, consisted of thirteen children. Today, more than 300 children, ages seven to seventeen, come over each summer. Their time in the United States helps lower the levels of radiation in their bodies, boost their immune systems, and provides an opportunity to receive medical and dental care that they truly need.

The cost just to bring their host child, Alina, back this year was about $2000 she says, money that is to be raised completely by the host family. The Efirds have been able to raise the necessary fees through fundraisers with Yankee Candle, Tupperware, selling poinsettias at Christmas, and car wash tickets through Autobell, as well as soliciting donations.

The host family is also responsible for the costs of day to day living, including clothing, food, and medical appointments, just as if the child was part of the family. And it’s clear that’s exactly what Alina has become to the Efirds. In fact, Heather often refers to Alina as her daughter.

Heather says last summer Alina went to lots of baseball games that her son, Blake, was playing in. They also took her to the mountains, a local animal park called Lazy 5 Ranch, and to the beach in Oak Island, NC. Alina also attended a weekly bible study that was taught in Russian. I asked her to tell me about a favorite memory, but she couldn’t pick just one! “She comes from a low income family and lost her father two years ago. Every day was like Christmas to her while she was with us last summer.” Heather said.

Host families are still needed in order to bring more children here each summer. Heather says, “This is a life changing experience for all that are involved but it's not easy. These children speak little to no English so communication is a big hurdle. No matter how difficult the situation is...the LOVE in that child's eyes makes it all worth it.” The Efirds have been able to call Alina a few times since she left last summer, but say the best way to keep in touch is through a translator and an email address provided by ABRO.

Since this is their second year hosting through the program, I asked Heather what it was exactly that made her family want to sign up again. Thoughtfully, she said, “When we first got involved with the program I kept thinking about how much we would change this child's life forever. The thing that she will never realize is how much she has changed OUR family. I never knew how this would affect my life forever.”

As Alina’s travel date gets closer and closer, I can’t help but imagine what a wonderful reunion it will be for all of them!!

For more information on how to help with donations or to become a host family, please visit http://www.abro.org/

Originally posted by Heather from UnionCountyMommies.com on The Mommies Network National Blog, 5/26/11